2014...........yeah, not diggin' it.

So 2014, the Year of the Horse, Winter Olympics and as far as I can tell, every kind of upheaval known to man!  Okay maybe a tad dramatic, but seriously, EVERYONE I KNOW is going through something.  Some kind of personal change or challenge.

  Some friends have wonderful things that are disrupting their lives; births, weddings, new projects.  Others of us are slogging through the not so much fun realities of life.  And for some it feels as if the onslaught if shit, and the continuing winter, is never ending. Oh and let's not forget: The Ukraine, Venezuela, Syria, Uganda, Arizona!

 I do not intend this to be a whine fest, but there is no denying 2014 came in like a bitch.  So what are we to make of it?  Well I don't know.  Oh sorry if you were hoping for some nugget of insight.  I've got nothing.  Swimming with alligators,  is taking all my energy, nothing left for bon mots.

But I do feel or at least I choose to feel, that we are "on the ragged edge of anticipation", to paraphrase Mark Twain.  In other words, something's gotta give!  Will you be ready when it happens?  Will I?

My friends, and you know who you are, I will have your back and you will have mine and together we will get through this cosmic sludge. We can't fix Syria et al but if we take care of each other, that has to spread like a ripple on a pond hasn't it?  It has to make some kind of difference, hasn't it?...............Ugh I really hope so.

Thank you Gilda Radner~ " Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next."

photo by Sarah Lee

What's a weirdo to do?

I do not "fit in". This is not a lament, just a statement of fact.  When I was younger I thought that I was missing something, that there was something wrong with me, but as I got older I realized my differences were actually my strengths.

I do not see the world the way most people around me do.

I am gobsmacked by how easily privileged, well educated folk can turn away from anyone in need, or in pain.

I find the ease with which we divide ourselves into " us and them " to be quite terrifying.

I don't want to live anywhere, where the abuse of children or animals is okay.

I don't understand how you forget.

I don't understand.

I see the world differently.

It took me so long to realize that that was okay and I had lost it for a while, but no more.

 My intention for this New Year is to piss people off, shake things up, challenge, wave my freak flag high, and get all up in your face with my differences.

"They thought I was a Surrealist but I wasn't.I never painted dreams. I painted my reality."~Frida Kahlo

photo by Rodney Smith

We need men who can dream of things that never were.~ JFK

In November 1963 my family was emigrating from England. We had left England's Lake District, where scraping together enough snow to make a tiny snowman perhaps half a meter high was a huge deal, only to  arrive in Weyburn Saskatchewan during one of the worst winters they had seen in years.

But this is about a journey.

 I am sure, although I do not remember, that being on a train and no longer seasick on a boat, was a great relief.  Sailing the wintery North Atlantic seems a questionable choice, but at that time my mother refused to get on a plane, so in November of 1963 we were traveling  from Quebec to Saskatchewan by train.

I am sure, although I do not remember, that my brother and I were happy to be on this new adventure, safe and warm watching the white, flat horizon rush by.

I am sure, although I do not remember, that my parents were upset, shocked, appalled

But I remember the black porters crying.  I will always remember that.

" For in the final analysis, our most basic common link, is that we all inhabit this small planet, we all breathe the same air, we all cherish our children's futures, and we are all mortal. " ~ John F Kennedy

I Won't Grow Up!

This morning I have seen two videos of old women.  One an 86 year old gymnast and the other an old lady doing a zumba class.  And while I love watching them I kind of have a problem with the way they are being presented. 

If a person is in good health, why shouldn't they continue to do things they have enjoyed doing all their lives?

The sense I get is that most  people are amazed that anyone in their 70's, 80's, 90's, can even get out of their chairs and should be roundly applauded every time they do so. They are being dragged out like a circus act. And read the comments;  " so cute ", " bless her".   I cannot speak for these ladies, but I  ain't cute !  Never aspired to be.

There are people in a yoga class I take who are older than me and stronger and more flexible and more focused.  Their practice is inspiring regardless of their age.   I have had a 20 something come up to me in the change rooms at the same yoga studio and tell me " Oh my god you are such an inspiration!"  I know it was meant as a compliment but it was hugely condescending. 

I think my very first blog on this site was about still being who I am regardless of how society sees me.  In other words those of us, particularly women, of a certain age, still have stories to tell, still want to dance and sing and create.  And it should be seen as a  natural progression, not an anomaly.

Today's last word goes to Helen Mirren ~ " Two phrases I hate in reference to female characters are 'strong' and 'feisty'.  They really annoy me.  It's the most condescending thing.  You say that about a three year old.  It infantilizes women."
Photo of Beatrice Wood

Two phrases I hate in reference to female characters are 'strong' and 'feisty.' They really annoy me. It's the most condescending thing. You say that about a three-year-old. It infantilises women.
Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/h/helen_mirren_4.html#cFTx77Phj4E3tIAq.99

Robin Thicke in the library with a wrecking ball.

And then this happened.  If you haven't heard and don't have time to read the article although I suggest you do, it is pretty breathtaking and not in a good way; Mr Gilmour, a teacher at UofT explains, well proclaims his views on: female writers ( they suck ), Chinese witers ( he doesn't like them either ), and shocking his students( his mission ).  He is arrogant, self serving and comes across as a misogynist.  Or maybe he just doesn't get women, double entendre complete intended.

But Susan, shouldn't Mr.G be allowed to teach what he wants?  Well sure, there are after all courses on women writers, ethnic writers, LGBT writers.  The difference is, you don't say you are teaching literature and then say the only literature that counts is written by men.  And not any men but REAL GUYS, MEN'S MEN!

And then this happened, well actually this is the comic relief part of my rant.  If you don't have time to watch it, but you should this woman is funny,  it is Grace Helbig AKA "dailygrace" reviewing Miley Cyrus' video for Wrecking Ball.

  So the lyric, " I came in like a wrecking ball," is kind of a cool lyric.  The metaphor works on a couple of levels.  But it's a metaphor so why, in the video do we have Miley Cyrus on a real wrecking ball and giving head to a sledge hammer???  Oh and yes she's naked, of course she is cos that makes all kinds of sense.  Read the lyrics they are about love, not sex! 

And although he didn't start all this, but I am sure he thinks he did, we have Robin Thicke's Blurred Lines.  The link I would have put up isn't available any more.  It was a great parody by some women I believe from Australia, who appear in the video beautifully and completely dressed, with some guys in tidy whities.  It was deemed unsuitable and taken off you tube.  It is worth noting you can still watch the unrated version of Blurred Lines with topless models and a very confused and embarrassed looking sheep?!?!

So why these three things?  Well first of all I am not a prude, I have a collection of erotica by Anias Nin and A N Roquelaure, don't tell David they are women, and I quite like steamy moments in movies.  Watch Diane Lane and Viggo Mortensen discover each other in A Walk On The Moon.......... shvey!

 Also I am against censorship, so Mr.Gilmour can espouse his views and money grabbing record labels and artists can make videos full of gratuitous sex and the objectification of women.  But more than being about money it feels like desperate pleas for attention, and hey look it worked.

 Can't we be smarter?  Can't we ALL be equally sexual, intelligent, daring?  Can't we make ourselves look good without making anyone else look bad?

Just for a moment, close your eyes and imagine Robin Thicke in flesh coloured boxers desperately  rubbing up against beautifully dressed women who are pretty much ignoring him,  all the while singing " You know you want it "  For good measure throw David Gilmour in there too.

Turning leaves, and fluffy cats.

I am not a fall person.  I know so many people including those near and dear to me who love fall. While I appreciate the beauty of the leaves turning colours and pristine blue skies like today, when the moon is still visible at 11:00 AM ( she must have been at a fiesta ), fall for me just means winter is on the way.

I do not like to hibernate, I get cabin fever.  And I HATE being cold it makes me very grumpy and not much fun to be around.  One of my brothers lives in Lake Placid, holy winter!  Everybody there embraces their environment, they ski, skate, snowshoe, pretty much anything to be out of doors and active.  More power to them.

Before children I used to ski every winter, my family even went on ski vacations, I was pretty good at it.  Now, well it is crazy expensive and at this point having been off the slopes for so long I am afraid I would leave a knee cap on the hill and that, well it just wouldn't be fun.

I am a heat seeking monster!  Heat and hair frizzing humidity?  Bring it!

Enough Susan, enough, it is fall. So as part of my on going effort to be thankful for every thing in my life and deal with exactly what is in front of me.  I decided to make this a creative day.  While I compose this post I am making this!  and later I will make these!  My kitchen smells heavenly and yes there is a theme, I love figs.  While I try to buy local and hate seeing strawberries in store in January !?!?  There is something seductive about a fruit grown in hot, wind swept, sun baked climes.  So I will savour my fig jam and close my eyes and imagine myself in some impossibly white village, surrounded by an endless cerulean horizon; hot, hot oh so hot. 

 Check back with me in January to see if it is still working............ha.

Today's last word~ Johnny Mercer "  The falling leaves drift by the window, the autumn leaves of red and gold. I see your lips, the summer kisses, the sun burned hands I used to hold. "

Kittens, Kittens, Everywhere

We have 2 cats, Minerva and Tut.  Tut is a foster failure.  Blame my husband, he couldn't stand to part with the big lug, and he is big, about 20 lbs worth of cat.  Since Tut we have fostered 11 cats and kittens so I guess keeping one along the way isn't too bad.

When we first got Tut he was very nocturnal.  He used to prowl around at 4:00 in the morning, yodeling at ghosts and the gremlins who steal your breath.  We chalked it up to the 4 years he spent as a stray on the mean streets of Hamilton.  The way we throw animals away like so much garbage, wrecks me.  Anyway, eventually Tut got his internal clock organized and fell into the rhythm of the house, which meant sleeping at night, until the arrival of...............da, da, daaaaa............ INTRUDERS!

Yes there are 2 cats who regularly show up in our yard in the wee hours of the morning threatening to break into our home through the screen windows and kill us all in our sleep.  What is a guard cat to do?  Well I'll tell you what he does.  He patrols the halls, stopping at all windows and howling his fury, ALL NIGHT LONG!

 Which means the poor guy isn't getting much sleep, which would be fine, he could catch up during the day except, we have 2 new foster kittens.  2 very active foster kittens, who are what kittens are supposed to be, little shit disturbers.  They want to play tag and no matter how much Tut and Minerva growl and smack them away, they keep coming back for more.  They run around and over and through and up curtains............sigh,in great burst of sustained energy until they finally collapse into a pile of black and white purring exhaustion, and then they get up and do it all over again.  A friend of mine aptly described them as magpies.  They are all about the next shiny thing, unfortunately that is far too often Tut's tail.

So poor Tut has got it coming at him from all directions.  He was always the cat I could count on to be great with the others we brought in here, Minerva is a bit of a princess, but Tut, although he looks all kinds of thugging, was always welcoming and sweet.  And I think he still would be if it wasn't for the afore mentioned cats invading his territory. Please people, keep your cats indoors.

Anyway Tut will survive.  He gets extra treats ( at 20 lbs not exactly what he needs) and strokes and chin scratches, and I have caught him on more that one occasion, with a kitten, albeit in a strangle hold, grooming and washing the little thing. Yes and sometimes biting their ears, while growling at them.  But a cat has to maintain his position hasn't he?

Today's last word is from Rudyard Kipling~"Cat said, 'I am not a friend, and I am not a Servant. I am the Cat who walks by himself, and I wish to come into your Cave."